“‘Owt For A Quiet Life”

Some people just love drama. For some, it seems like life would be boring without it.

My Grandad used to say, God rest him, that he would do “‘owt for a quiet life”. For him, life was better when there was no drama, fewer arguments and peace in the house. He was gentle and easy-going. My Mum tells me that he was content with what he had – a steady job, good marriage and a beautiful family.

As long as he peeled the potatoes after Church, my Grandma would let him go out for a pint of mild and a game of snooker before Sunday Roast Dinner.

I think there’s a lot to be said for a quiet, gentle and easy-going life. It takes patience and maturity, but it’s not impossible. Perhaps, it’s because you become more understanding and accepting as you grow older. Although, it doesn’t happen to everyone.

I was blessed to live with wonderful people at university. I made great friends with those in my uni halls, and it’s meant I’ve been had some great friendships over the past three years.

But speaking to my other uni friends, they’ve found their friendships very difficult over the last few years.

Their friends, which became their housemates, rather quickly became difficult to live with. The dynamics of the friendships changed too much and they couldn’t adapt to living with each other. It was different from only seeing each other for a couple of hours a week in seminars. Learning to live with others is a challenge and there needs to be patience, compromise and understanding.

If there is drama for drama’s sake – cold shoulders, manipulation and unrealistic expectations of friendships – then it’s never going to work, even more so when you reach a point of no longer speaking to your so-called “friends” in the house.

I think there’s a lot to be said for “soft-touch friendships” where you don’t expect too much from them. You see them when you can, speak to them when you can and cherish the moments with them. There shouldn’t be unrealistic expectations, drama and manipulation.

In my opinion, that’s not what friendships are.

What do you think?
What are your friendships like?